Friday, November 26, 2010
Sunday, November 21, 2010
I wasn't worried about giving birth, even after the post partum issues I had with Eliza. For some reason I just knew that I could birth this baby with no problems and no help. I had been attending pre-natal yoga for a few months, and I learnt how to breathe.
Yes, I learnt how to breathe. Who would have thought that I needed lessons in breathing? Well, it was the most beneficial thing I could have done. I was (and still am) blessed to have an amazingly spiritual and knowledgeable yoga teacher who instilled confidence in me.
"Exhalation is the antidote to pain"
So I started labouring at home after a long day of trying to bring it on. The only thing that was stressing me out was care arrangements for Eliza, and how she would get to the hospital after the birth to meet her new sibling. I felt better once I realised that the baby would be born late at night, and that she would stay all cosy in bed.
The contractions became pretty strong on the way to the hospital and Craig kept looking at me nervously at the red lights he always seemed to be stopping at. The conversation was light hearted but a little strained. Not in an uncomfortable way, but in a "lets not poke the bear" way.
I beat my midwife Sue to the birthing suite. Sue is another amazing person I am so lucky to have in my life. I knew I was in competent experienced hands, and that we shared the same birth ideals. I was looking forward to sharing this experience with her. Our student midwife Tanya arrived and then Sue. I had to lie on the bed for a bit while a fetal monitor was fitted. Once it was obvious that there were no problems, I was able to get up and walk around, which was much better. I don't know how women can stand lying down whilst in labour. To me, it feels so wrong. When you are upright, gravity is working for you also!
For the next however long (I was in a time vortex), I wandered and rocked. Each contraction came stronger than the last. I found my rhythm. As I felt the first tightenings of a contraction coming, I would focus on my breathing. Big, slow deep breaths. Breathe in for 6 seconds, breathe out for 8 seconds...forget the pain, just breathe. Sounds around me became muffled. My husband remained quiet and still throughout the contractions, recognising that I didn't need any help, didn't want any touch or sound. It was just me and my breathing preparing my body and baby for the inevitable.
I suddenly felt dizzy and nauseous. Tanya helped me to the bed. Although I didn't want to get up on the horrid thing, I had no choice as I was sure I would otherwise vomit or pass out. As soon as I lied down, the next contraction felt different. It felt more urgent, my breathing wasn't as effective. I mumbled that I think I would be having a baby soon. Sue smiled at me and said something like "that's the plan". Everyone was acting in the same calm manner and I remember thinking, "what's wrong with you people? Don't you understand? I'm about to have a baby! Quick, put on your gloves, get the camera ready, this is serious people!". Another contraction came. More pressure down there, less composure up here. Again voiced my opinion that I was about to have a baby. This time I was taken a bit more seriously and Sue helped me get undressed. But we only got the bottom half off (which is the important half I guess) before I was in full-on labour.
As any woman who has had a baby knows, the feeling of bearing down is indescribable. It felt so uncomfortable but so right at the same time. So painful, but so final. My whole attitude changed. I looked up at Craig and whimpered that I would like some gas now (bit late for that), I crossed my legs and willed the baby back up. Sue was telling me that my baby was there, the head was there but I didn't believe her. She told me to feel the head and that all I needed to do was push but I resisted, knowing that the end bit would hurt the most. But of course you can't stop nature taking its course and with one push, out she slipped. She was placed on my chest straight away and there were silly loved up grins all around. It took a minute to remember to find out the sex, and when I saw she was a girl, I thought to myself, I knew that.
Really, it should end there, shouldn't it? Finish on a high. But no, then there is the not so pleasant business. The stitches, the checking for other tears, the mess. Luckily, having a totally brand new, home grown human being in your arms detracts from all that other stuff going on. The oxytocin running through my veins gave me a high that I didn't get to experience with Eliza. I was just so happy. As simple as that.
Friday, November 19, 2010
Ruby got her first cold the other day. Not a bad cold but ended up in a trip to the hospital regardless. Her snot is really sticky, not runny (thanks CF) so it didn't run out her nose. Babies can't blow noses or cough up phlegm purposely so everything ended up being swallowed. This resulted in her being constipated with a big sticky goopy poo which made it's way out with some help! Nothing is straightforward with a CF baby.
But we learn. Next time I won't be so freaked out by seeing green bile vomit and just give her some Glycerol. Next time I won't let Eliza watch Ruby get her temp checked rectally as a think we are in for a surprise when she next plays doctors...
I am thankful that I brought my babe home from hospital with me.
I am thankful that both my children will grow up to be active, busy kids with no physical disabilities to stop them.
I am thankful that Australia has a free healthcare system.
I am thankful for my husband who makes me a stronger mum and never let's me feel like I'm in this alone.
I am thankful that my birth experience with Ruby was natural, empowering and quick! I strongly believe that all that oxytocin running through me is what kept me going for that first week.
I am thankful for nurses. Unbelievably amazing people!!
We are so so thankful for our family & friends. All of your thoughts, prayers, visits, gifts and messages reached us at a time where we needed them most. They meant the world to us, please don't think we didn't notice : )
What are you thankful for in your life?